How I Found The Love Of My Life

Happy Valentines day everyone.  I hope this day is filled with love and joy from the most important people around you. There is a saying that states that you meet your soulmate before the age of 21. I am not sure if this is true, but in my case it did happen to me. You know what? I never even knew it. Meet my love Elleon Noya. An incredible, beautiful soul. A man that exceeds every man that I have met in my life. I know that it sounds like I am somewhere on cloud nine, and yes I am. We have been crazy in love. Yessss, like Beyoncé used to sing- I am talking about the type of love that we both have been searching for our whole lives. What makes our bond so special is that there is a beautiful story behind our love. Let me tell you guys how we met 32 years ago and how we came to be.

Amsterdam 1988.

It was 1988. I was a vibrant, highly ambitious young teenager. A young girl, only seventeen years old.  I was studying ballet at the Lucia Marthas Institute For Performing Arts and desperately wanted to become a singer. Amsterdam was the capital of sizzling nightlife, and I was taking part in it like every “cool” teenager. The eighties was the era of big hair, shoulder pads, distressed mom jeans, hoop earrings. I loved listening to Janet Jackson, Jody Watley, Prince, Chaka Khan, SOS Band, Vanessa Williams, Sade and Bobby Brown, you name it. Hip–hop had broken through big by the mid-1980s. Think Mantronix,  Run DMC, LL Cool J, and Grand Master Flash.  The clubs “where it all happened”  were: Club Richter, The Bios at the Leidse Plein, BeBop, Escape and Zorba The Budha. Zorba conveniently located on the Oudezijds Voorburg Wal near Dam Square. The Young, hip and Urban Amsterdam crowd would flock to “be seen” here. I loved life discovering young adulthood. Dressing up in the latest fashion, trying out the latest makeup trends and dreaming of a career in music. When it came to boys, I was considered a late bloomer. I’d only been with one boyfriend and after four months that didn’t end well. I had dropped out of high school at sixteen, but I was determined to move on and focus on my ballet and singing studies. Hitting the clubs partying took my mind of my young heartache. I was lucky to have the coolest girl squad. My girls Claudia, Vanessa, Barbara, Nora and Lucienne were my absolute besties. We were like the ultimate party girls, dressing up before going out, getting our drink on, and even took our first XTC together – Something that went completely wrong the second time I took it- so after that, I never touched drugs again EVER. We felt like we were women of the world. Feeling fabulous like Carrie Bradshaw and her friends from Sex And The City. It’s hilarious to think we were only young kids at the time.

So there I was, I went out one night to Club Zorba. I was with my friend Claudia. The funny thing is, I remember it so well up to a point that I still know what I was wearing. Ain’t that a true fashion girl? Okay, so I was wearing a skin-tight grey crinkled Hunza G dress paired with black suede high heel ankle boots. I grabbed the booties from my mom. My hair was long, dark and curly and I was wearing a particular sexy pink lipgloss. I remember the color of my lipshade because I had just recently purchased it a makeup counter that imported their products from the US. After my breakup with my first and only boyfriend, I needed that treat, so I had grabbed this very overpriced lipstick and couldn’t wait to rock it.  It was a Thursday night and it was crowded. A night where all the beautiful people came out. Studying dance, I was always kicking it on the dance floor. Although I received a lot of male attention even up to a point where it would become too much, boys bored me. Their usual lines like”girl you are hot, beautiful, sexy or whatever” were something I was used to since I was 12 years old and made me yawn. Without trying to sound braggy, boys liked me and at the age of seventeen, I was very aware of my sex appeal. I was not the arrogant type of girl, but I wasn’t interested in boys at all. I sure never chased them or anything in that matter. At this age, I was focussed on breaking into the music scene, already dreaming of moving to London and the US. I was a sassy, “happy go lucky” teenager. Adventurous, funny and kind and yes on top of that this girl was ambitious.

And then there he was, diagonally across from me on the dance floor. A boy so gorgeous I had never seen before. A naughty twinkle in his eye, wearing a pair of the coolest distressed jeans and nonchalant black blazer. A little bit of a bad boy, with eyes that said that he didn’t care what people thought of him What stood out the most was his beautiful skin and thick wavy hair down to his back. Long hair on guys was a “thing” back in the eighties. Just like beards and tattoos today. He looked like he stepped out of a music video. He was a showstopper. You know like in the movies? Where all of sudden everything around this person goes blurry? Like a bright light just hit him and I could only see him. I was drawn to him like a magnet, it was love at first sight. Something in me said: “I need to talk to him, even better,  I must talk to him”! So I did what went completely against my nature. I approached a boy. I didn’t even hesitate, it was meant to be. Tap tap, I did on his shoulder. He looked at me surprised, friendly. His eyes curious who I was. “I love your hair” I blurted out. He smiled when I said it, a little shy. Right there we got to know each other a little, on a busy dancefloor, and the world around me stopped. He was a musician since childhood, a very talented drummer and was born into a musical family. His mother Shana and father Nippy Noya are well-known established musicians and had been touring the world playing percussion with international artists, like Santana, Chaka Khan, Sheila E, Kool & The gang and Robert Palmer just to name a few.

Elleon had inherited his parents talent and love for music. I was intrigued by his story. I told him I wanted to become a singer. It was amazing how we both shared a huge passion for music. That night Elleon was with his friend, musician and, singer Dillon Lewis. They told me they played in a band called D-extended. They mentioned how they would be playing in the popular upscale club BeBop – former club IT –  the next week and asked me if I wanted to come to see the show. They would even arrange free tickets. See their show? Say what?  I was super excited. So of course, I went. I took my girlfriend Claudia, because she was also curious to see them . That night, we walked into club BeBop and I was surprised how crowded it was. Club BeBop was a really big club, and it seemed D-Extended had a lot of local fans because the place was packed. At this point, I didn’t know what to expect, so when they finally came out on stage I was blown away. It was a pretty big band and although all very young, their talent was incredible. Dillon was the frontman and singer, accompanied by another male and female vocalist. Elleon played percussion and he looked on fire. From that moment I knew, I wanted to become part of this band. Little did I know that’s exactly what happened. A few weeks after their show in Club BeBop I got a call from Dillon if I wanted to audition for an opening spot as a singer. I was ecstatic. I would be able to sing, perform and be close to this boy Elleon that I had a huge crush on. In my eyes we could be the perfect couple. Elleon, on the other hand, had no clue I was so crazy about him. I was too shy and I never told him. He adored me too, but he was too young to do anything about it. We were both kids, still young and foolish.

D-Extended and I right before going on stage at Club Bios in Amsterdam.

A few weeks later I got the call from Dillon, I was accepted to join D-extended. Becoming a singer was my big dream, so I was extremely excited.  I thought that besides being able to sing, I would also be able to really get to know Elleon. We would be playing together, performing and hanging out. I was so excited for this new phase in my life. In my childlike mind I had a strong feeling we would be great together. Fate took it’s turn and everything changed. Right at that time where I thought I could get closer to him, Elleon received an opportunity to form his own band, and left D- Extended very unexpectedly. For some reason I felt a magnetic pull towards him that I had never felt before with anyone, and now he left. I felt disappointed and I moved on. When he left, we completely lost touch and went our seperate ways. Little did I know that I wouldn’t see him again. Not for another 31 years, but it was meant to be. The universe said we weren’t ready.

2012

Many years had passed and Elleon the beautiful seventeen-year-old boy had become a faded memory. I had moved away to England when I was 18, had my child Lyon and lived in Los Angeles where I had worked as a dancer and singer for many years after that. I was back in Amsterdam, it was 2012 and there it was. A message popped up on Facebook. It was Elleon. I was incredibly surprised to ”see” him again after 24 years. He told me how he remembered me so well and how it had been such a long time since we had seen each other. He even remembered my pink All-Star sneakers and silver hoop earrings I used to wear. Talking about paying attention to details right?  He was still very active in music and was hosting jam sessions for artists and musicians at Club Bourbon Street in Amsterdam. Remembering me as a singer, he invited me to come out to one of his jam sessions and join him and his band on stage. I’d just launched TC Style Clues and was busy building and growing my fashion platform. I was also in a relationship at the time. I promised Elleon I would visit. He asked me multiple times, but for some reason, I never had the chance to come through. The timing still wasn’t right. We supported each other with “likes” on Facebook and sometimes we would write a nice reply when posting a photo. It was always just on a friendly basis. It was fun to watch him share photos of his children or musical activities. Elleon, on the other hand, watched me grow through my travels and would see the regular blog photos pop up on his news feed. He didn’t get I was blogging about fashion. He didn’t even know what a blog was. He just thought I was a model lol. In 2018 he wrote me a private message how he hoped we would cross paths again. Elleon had thrown a wish into the universe. That we would meet again. It was just a matter of time

A year went by and it was early 2019.  I was going through a very difficult time. I had broken off my four-year engagement to my then fiancé Emiel. I was healing from the heartbreak and doing a pretty good job picking up the pieces and restoring my life. After years of being in the wrong relationships, I was single again. I would stay like that for a long time I thought. I was done trying to find love. Then one day, it was the 23rd of April I received the sweetest, most sincere message from any man that I’d ever met. It was Elleon. It was as if he felt this was the right timing. It was so thoughtful and kind. It touched my heart. He still tells me today that he had prayed and looked up to God before he sent out that message to me. We started talking and we never stopped. We talked for hours, days and weeks. It felt like we had come home. This man. The handsome cute boy from my past had grown into an even more beautiful person. Kind, understanding, loving, patient, passionate and loyal. Our friendship quickly turned into love. We couldn’t stop what had been written in the stars all along.

Over the years we had grown into a better and improved version of ourselves. It both took our fair share of struggle, heartbreak, pain and disappointments, but also happy events like raising kids, extensive travel and amazing work acomplishments. We had to be fully ready to be together. To not make the mistakes we had made in our previous relationships. To be able to give each other what we truly deserved. We keep telling each other we are true soulmates. Both born in the same hospital in Amsterdam, three months apart from each other. We even found out that we were always close to each other without both of us even knowing. In 1998 I was in New York, only to find out years after he was there at the exact same time. How in previous years he had parked his car across from my home in Amsterdam totally not knowing I lived there. Just because it was such a perfect spot to park when he would go shopping at the Albert Cuyp market. I live only half a mile away from the market. It’s just a few examples of numerous occasions where we would be literally just around the corner from eachother. We had an invisble string attached and it was inevitable that it would pull us together one day. Just like it pulled on the day we met on the dancefloor in 1988.

Over the past year, we’ve been together, we love reminiscing  how we met eachother, what happened in those days when we were seventeen years old. We keep telling each other how we wish we could travel with a time machine and go back to the day we met. Our memories are a funny thing sometimes. Some past events are so clear that it seems like it only happened yesterday and some memories are completely gone and can’t be relived nomatter how many times we try to remember. For example, Elleon gave me his phone number in 1988 and to this day I couldn’t remember how he had given it to me, when and where. We both have been going on and on in our minds, but with no luck. Then it happened a few weeks ago. We received our time machine. It was like it was meant to be found now and not a day earlier. I was cleaning out my attic. Clearing out old boxes and what did I find to my huge surprise? My diary from 1988. I felt like I had dug up a treasure box filled with gold, but this was so much better. My heart stopped when I opened to read it. There it was my seventeen-year-old handwriting. These were my own written thoughts. It was pure, childlike and uncensored and Elleon was all in it. Young teenager that I was, I had his name spelled totally wrong, “Alien – like the movies-.  There were little stories from the day we met,  the day I went to see his show at club BeBop, to the days I fell madly in love with him after he handed me his phone number. We finally knew where he had given it to me. There were my thoughts of how in love I had been. I had completely forgotten how intense it felt at the time. In my memory, Elleon was just a crush. Reading my diary from 1988, Elleon and I had the opportunity to travel back in time as we had always wanted. The beautiful thing is, it has deepened our love, even more, made it even the more special than it already is. We are both so grateful that we have found each other. If I had only known then how important my teenage diary blabbering would be now. How much it means to us.

Don’t ever stop believing in true love. Somehow I always felt there was someone out there. That special someone made for me. It took me 31 years to find him. Elleon who believes in the magic of  true love, loyalty and complete acceptance of each other. How we as a couple should always strive to become better, as a unit, as a team, as best friends, as partners, as lovers, every day. Me and him. We are done searching. We have found each other. Thanks for reading my friends.

“Elleon my love, I must I have done something right to deserve a man like you. I lucked out. You are a true gem in the purest form. You lift me up. You motivate me. You support me. You love me like no other, and I love you like no other. Thank you. You complete me – not because I need it, but because you just do”

Happy Valentines day!

With love,

XO Tamara Chloé